I could be the only person...

to cry to TI song.  More then one TI song actually.  I think most people would find that TI, a R&B artist, does not bring them to tears, but I do.  I went on a walk today and for some silly reason I listened to his album because Brian had purchased it on our ipod.   Two years ago he had a hit song titled, "you can have whatever you like."  This song would put Brian in a good mood and instantly put a smile on his face.  It was this time of year when the song came out (actually I think of St. Patrick's day 2009 to be exact) and he would BLARE it in his car with the windows rolled down and the sunny, warm arm blowing in the car.  This song makes me think of Friday afternoons in spring when Brian would get of work (FAC- Friday After Cube (cubicle) as he called it).  We would go somewhere and he would sing this to me all the time.  Brian would look at me in the eyes and say "you can have whatever you like."  I think the song talks about  buying a $5 million dollar house, shopping for whatever I want, etc. 

I would give up every penny I could ever make if it meant he was back here.  I think as humans we become so dependent on things.  We need the latest and greatest, we need to be the Jones', but I would give up everything to not be the Jones'.  Brian and I had this saying/dream.  From the start of our dating anytime life got hectic, stressful, or just got to be too much we would say "let's just go to Jamaica and open a bait shop on the beach".  We would lay in bed and talk about our bait shop.  How simple it would be.  It would be a small shack, with brightly painted colors, a raggedy old chair, and a cooler of bait.  We would talk about giving everything up and moving to a foreign country to sit in paradise and enjoy it. 

It was this dream that made us decide to honeymoon in Jamaica.  We fell in love with Jamaica. We fell in love with how happy people were there.  If you drove around Jamaica you could see the poverty and you would think it was a horrible place. Not us.  We saw beauty in it.  We saw true happiness in the people that lived there.  People didn't live outside of their means, they lived small and enjoyed what they had.  I won't lie I've had many thoughts about picking up and leaving and moving to Jamaica.  However, I'm too scared to do it by myself. 

I wish life was simple.